Self-regulation is one of the most important attributes a professional can possess when working with young people. However, there are always moments that can test anyone’s resolve and activate the adult’s stress response system.

It’s well-known that working with children and young people can be stressful. This stress can be magnified when those children are dysregulated. Furthermore, the adults involved also have lives outside of their caregiving roles, which brings its own set of stressors. As noted by Read (2010), "If as a practitioner we feel overwhelmed or isolated, our caregiving capacity shrinks, and we tend to apply a caregiving style that is about ‘one size fits all.'"

The evidence is clear: our work with children impacts us. We tend to "mirror" their emotions, and our experiences while supporting others can affect us as well (Bastiaansen et al., 2009). It’s essential to recognise that having emotional responses to this work is NOT a reflection of your professional ability; rather, it is a NORMAL response to the nature of the work. Therefore, it is crucial to prioritise your own wellbeing and allow time for reflection to minimise the chances of burnout and issues such as secondary trauma.

Managing our emotional well-being is unique to each of us. What works for one person may not work for another, and it’s crucial to adapt and continually reflect on our individual needs. Focusing on our well-being requires a shift in mindset; it should become an active part of our routines. Finding what works best for you is essential.

Dan Siegel offers a useful framework here discussing the Healthy Mind Platter (SIEGEL, 2020), which suggests several areas for consideration:

  1. Sleep Time: When we give the brain the rest it needs to consolidate learning and recover from the experiences of the day.
  2. Play Time: When we allow ourselves to be spontaneous or creative, playfully enjoying novel experiences, which helps make new connections in the brain.
  3. Down Time: When we are non-focused, without any specific goal, and let our mind wander or simply relax, which helps our brain recharge.
  4. Focus Time: When we closely focus on tasks in a goal-oriented way, taking on challenges that make deep connections in the brain.
  5. Time-In Reflection: When we quietly reflect internally, focusing on sensations, images, feelings and thoughts, helping to better integrate the brain.
  6. Connecting Time: When we connect with other people, ideally in person, or take time to appreciate our connection to the natural world around us, richly activating the brain’s relational circuitry.
  7. Physical Time: When we move our bodies, aerobically if possible, which strengthens the brain in many ways including in its plasticity.


So, consider using this framework to challenge your approach to your own wellbeing!